HEBREW RADIO RITE
Dreamed 1997/10/12 by Chris Wayan
The ancient Hebrews had an annual rite involving headdresses decorated with bronze wires, a bit like insect antennae, supposed to pick up the voice of God.
And they DO work as antennae: in today's crowded radio spectrum, they often pick up local stations! This can get embarrassing, but the Orthodox go on with the rite, gritting their teeth and playing deaf to the sports announcers and pundits and rappers.
The Reform version disconnects the speaker, of course.
I can't figure out how this all started. Four thousand years ago, there was radio silence--nothing to pick up.
Or was that true? I speculate, to a Jewish friend troubled by the ceremony, "Is it possible the rite goes back to an ancient encounter with aliens who gave them advice, played God via radio for a while?"
"Isn't that a bit, um, Doris Lessing?" says my friend.
"Yeah, I guess it is. But how else could primitives build headgear that just happens to be a portable radio? And don't tell me God wanted it. God doesn't need a Walkman to get through. I think someone wanted to play oracle."
Only now, there are too damn many oracles...
NOTE THE NEXT MORNING
Shamanic dreaming, a state I've been entering more and more often, was originally meant to contact the spirits, to gain advice and heal the sick. But I live in one of the world's great cities--one notorious for eccentrics, geniuses, and New Age experimenters! Around here, the telepathic spectrum's overcrowded! Instead of messages from God, I've been dreaming other people's thoughts, fears, dreams... static.
MORAL: If you don't like spiritual interference, either learn finer tuning or pull the plug!
ALTERNATE MORAL: Maybe you'd be able to filter out the thoughts of others if you knew who you are...
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