I dream that I signed a prenatal contract for my current life. The deal guaranteed me good luck in some areas and bad in others. The purpose of this off-centered luck seems to be to give me lots of free time to focus on art, writing, and spirituality. But I'm not sure--you see, I've forgotten just what the contract said.

Silky, my spirit wife, volunteers to be my emissary to the spirit world and go find out what the deal was exactly--and who I signed it with. I'm reluctant to let her go--I'd rather have fun with her and forget this spiritualism stuff. But part of the deal seems to be no lovers in the physical world--since sexual or emotional ties might be distracting.

I signed away my sex rights? Sounds insane, but it could be true. Weird things happen on my dates--unlikely little disasters. Even astral sex with Silky is rare--we usually get interrupted.

But I'm not willing to live by these monastic rules any more. And yet... to change them, I have to know where I stand...

So I let Silky go.

And miss her already.

My emissary.

2001 NOTE

It's been a long journey, too. Over a year now, and I've hardly recalled any dreams at all, after decades of vivid dreaming. What I do recall is subdued, dull, and often relates to getting this website up. Practicality! And no more Silky. I miss her.

But then, I miss me, too.

The full me.

The whole me! No more cut-rate me.

And she's doing this to help find that me.

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