World Dream Bank: HICKOPHOBIA

HICKOPHOBIA

Dreamed 1996/5/13 by Chris Wayan

(If the words are too hard to read: just the words.) page 1 of the dream 'Hickophobia'.
page 2 of the dream 'Hickophobia'.
page 3 of the dream 'Hickophobia'.
page 4 of the dream 'Hickophobia'.

NOTES

Japanese: compulsive obligation, courtesy, comparing self to others...
My mom's voice inside me is hypocritical: she couldn't live up to this ideal of Japanese propriety she wants ME to fake.
Stretching myself is good--but not pretending I like what I don't.
The dictionary game: I just saw the film "The Truth about Cats and Dogs." I found it poignant, even painful--not the two lovers, you know they'll make it, they're totally compatible--gifted and kooky like me. But I grieved for their cute but normal friend the model, who always ends up with mean shitty guys. She tries so hard to keep up with her gifted friends, uses a dictionary to read a book they both love, the letters of Beauvoir and Sartre. But she says sadly "it was too hard for me, even with a dictionary." The movie ends with her alone and they don't seem to be helping her find someone though she sure helped THEM.
So... if you're not gifted, you doesn't deserve love or even decent treatment? How many hoops do people have to jump through?