I'm in Golden Gate Park with married friends. They quarrel, then kiss and make up--over and over. They define their limits by trespassing--and it looks like fighting turns them on, too.

I'm single. It's frustrating, watching them fight and flirt.

Wistfully watch a teenage girl instead. At first she dances around on the lawn, but finally she sprawls and rests under a nearby tree, and talks with a friend.

I pretend to listen to my friends, but keep sneaking guilty looks at her. She's way underage, 14 at most, maybe younger, wearing a big T-shirt. Long bare caramel legs. So cute. She's half sitting, half reclining on her back, knees up, idly bonking together. I'm ashamed but excited to see so far up her dress/shirt, especially when she spreads her knees. Then... a flash of metal! A ring! She's naked under the tee. It's a silver clit ring! No, two. There's an irregular patch of blue, too: a chunk of turquoise over her clitoral hood! A third ring thru the lower end of her outer labia, and a smaller, round polished piece of turquoise.

I feel so turned on--not by the jewelry per se but by the statement it makes. She wants to be seen! She isn't a child who'd be shocked by my interest, but a precocious, whimsical, no, bizarre, only-in-San Francisco teen, a sexually confident girl who LIKES attention--and shocking adults.

Who just might like a dream artist like me.

NOTES

I walked in Golden Gate Park today, but don't recall anyone like this! But recently, on Halloween, in the huge Spiral Dance held by all the witches in San Francisco, I was near the head of our strand. Near me danced a cute, barefoot teen with a navel ring and a turquoise skirt; after the dance, she showed a friend how to somersault.

I think the dream is suggesting that at least one of the girls I DID pass today in the Arboretum, or in the Spiral Dance, might have liked me if I'd tried to talk. Smiles met me everywhere, but I was too shy to follow up...

If I act like the turquoise girl, if I bare MY secrets, my weird inner world... maybe I'll attract others? Jeez, how timid I am. Here I am in a city FULL of noncomformist refugees. Why assume the real me would shock anyone?

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