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1993; nondream digital picture-poem by Chris Wayan

Not all anorexia is due to skinny models. I'm anorexic; it's under control now, but for years I accidentally on purpose forgot to eat... part of my campaign to die from self-neglect, so I could return to the wonderful spirit world full-time, and leave this stupid meat-world behind. Euro languages lack words for this hunger, though Nigerians call us Abiku or Ogbanje--souls reluctant to incarnate, always longing to go home to our spirit-friends.

I decided to acknowledge this hunger rather than pretend I was ashamed of it, or that I was ill, or a mere victim fooled by the media.

My light, angelic, anorexic soul in the clouds, with my unicorn lover behind me, leaping past the moon...
Because only when I treat my spiritual hunger as legitimate does my food-appetite come back, and my weight stabilize. And (most important of all) by naming myself abiku, I attract others with an appetite for heaven, not for junk food and vomit... so instead of food issues, the world brings me spiritual opportunities.

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