I'm inside a science fiction novel. I visit a small town hiding something--I can sense it. But no need for detective work--the writer soon spells it out:
A Black Separatist commune genetically engineered two "Pure Examples of the Race"--two little telekinetic girls. One's just 7-8, her sister's just 4, so they don't consistently remember to hide it yet--but their carelessness is less hazardous than you'd think, since their telekinesis is hard to trace to them--stuff just moves, nothing to hint who or what the cause is. Could be anyone or anything nearby. I do get a vague sensation that something psychic's going on, but that's all--no locale.
I first meet the two helping grownup relatives--mechanics at work in a garage--by lifting engine blocks that'd take a powerful crane.
Interesting. I sorta expected my sixth or seventh sense would see an aura-arm or energy-bridge between child and motor. Nope! Just my nondirectional feeling of psychic activity near me.
Then I visit the commune. A mob of kids run around & play. The two are well camouflaged here--unless you look at how they play. They're lugging a wheelbarrow, looking cute and normal--except that the barrow's cargo, while not huge, is a solid chunk of metal weighing more than both girls together.
Oh, and behind them a frisbeelike disk rolls, and a few other little accessory bits hop and bounce along, little telekinetic afterthoughts much more visible to Muggles than the real miracle of the barrow.
I don't know whether the commune's adults have noticed yet that I know about the two. It could be a problem. They're so secretive and protective they may want to kill me! They're as extreme as many white supremacists; see all nonblacks as potential persecutors, and that could drive them to violence.
Yet I don't identify as white, black or brown; I identify as witch, like the kids; we three belong to a different minority, one the majority historically (and hysterically) shunned, exploited and/or burned alive.
NOTES IN THE MORNING
- A minority treated worse than black: I just saw the film Rumble, on Native American musicians. It was full of people who deliberately passed as Black because how they got treated as Indians was even worse. This dream reminds me I too tried to pass--as human. Autistics, prodigies and psychics have real sensory, cognitive and behavioral differences making the imaginary differences of race look trivial. I failed to pass--my differences are extreme--but I sure tried. Because normals treat prodigies as freaks and performing seals; for centuries they burned witches alive; and they treated autistics as human defects to be sterilized or gassed. Oh, but it's all better now! I was just bullied, mocked, hit, spat on, underpaid and underlaid. Nicer than the Holocaust. But not good.
- Separatists are a danger to me: Two nights ago I asked Luna the Dream Goddess to send me dream-advice. Her answer? First night, strangers saw I was a freak, and shoved me off a cliff, a clear warning that I STILL underestimate normals' capacity for evil. Tonight's dream equated the treatment of genetic freaks like me with the racism documented in Rumble. Though what endangered me here was separatist siege-mentality! That suggests:
- Indulging in such alienation isn't healthy for me. It may clarify issues and build confidence--separatism often does--but fosters paranoia too.
- The left's ideology pigeonholes me by race and gender, not mind or senses. The left is no more my friend than the right is--if for different reasons.
- Telekinesis: metaphor for my differences, only visible in their consequences? Shorthand for all forms of paranormal ability? It's the most spectacular and controversial. Or... literal?
- ACTION: politically? Unclear. Emotionally? Beware. Hmm... historically? Examine my own experience of TK! I never really have. Not even a category for it in the World Dream Bank.
NEXT DAY
Check my own journals for telekinesis/psychokinesis. I was more aware of it than I thought; find chaotic spotty flags for apparent events. Not consistent; find SIX different codes over the years, none dominant: I consolidate them to one for causing or witnessing telekinetic events inside a dream, like the dream above; a second for waking events that appear to be telekinetic. Once I've cleaned up the record, find more than I expected.
QUICK LIST ON TELEKINESIS
- 1973. In college, I desperately needed a single room. I was an undiagnosed autistic forced to share with a party animal. A small single room came up. We all agreed to roll dice for it. I felt myself will the high roll I needed to win my privacy. Felt guilty, too--but not very, for I didn't want it like the other two, I NEEDED it. Privacy and sleep overrode my sense I was cheating.
- 1983: working at Stanford, I talked with my sister about resenting sexy, privileged Stanford girls. I felt a smoldering rage. Soon I smelled it. Molten metal, burning insulation. A fuse in the ceiling melted, dripping hot, toxic PCB tar down on us! Again, I felt myself doing it, though it was less willed than rage-driven. This time, I did feel unalloyed guilt. No better than a physical tantrum!
- 1984: my friend Tom told me how his belief that a live power saw was unplugged somehow kept it off, saving his thumb; once he pulled away, on went the saw again. His story so inspired me that (I was driving at the time) I tried to will my car's touchy-brake problem to vanish. It did--and resumed later when I was alone (and uninspired).
- 1985, my friend Val told of resenting a smug wineseller; she willed a bottle to shatter in his hand. Drew blood and scared him--goodbye smugness! She felt satisfied, proud. I was appalled. Half moralizing (one should not use Magic for Evil), but half just fear of Villagers with Torches.
- 1988: skim the whole section in Meyer Library, Stanford, on parapsychological research. One psychic's biography (unfortunately my journal doesn't record author/title) reports he found ESP worked with living things, including plants, but inanimate stuff was unresponsive, until he realized he dreaded being called a crackpot for even trying. Once he approached it naïvely, he found small TK events feasable. Pretty much matches my experience; TK's parameters depend as much on belief systems as talent, will, motivation or practice.
- 2000-2005, I experimented with computer solitaire--I willed useful cards and got them, way above random. I could feel the effort--like flexing an unused muscle. Sadly I wasn't consistently journaling then (too busy building the World Dream Bank) so I can't find details. But unlike the other examples, this was consistent, calm, and long-term.
- 2009: I had to hang a huge solo artshow for a theatre benefit in San Francisco--some 45-50 paintings & sculptures, on two floors. As I prepped, one art piece jumped off my wall and broke, with no one near, after years of stability.
- Next day, a bigger one did exactly the same after years on that wall. On deadline, a reinforced container (I was taking no chances) burst open and a third piece fell; this time, glass shattered; shards cut my hands. More ambiguous since it was during transport, not like the untouched two. Still, it was clear to me that something or someone hated that show--and was willing to hurt my art AND ME to stop it. Scared, angry, bleeding, I still hung it. Turned out the saboteur was right; it was a debacle. The publicist was incompetent, the hundreds promised didn't show. Days of wasted work for the cast, the caterers... and me.
- In 2012 I got addicted to Spider Solitaire. One day I discussed ESP with a friend; later that night, I played obsessively till I was tired & sore. Wanted to play, wanted to quit. Addiction & pain, at war! Suddenly I got three consecutive unstartable games. At the middle level of spider solitaire I played, about 1% of games are unplayable, so the odds against three back to back are about 100 cubed--a million to one. I took the hint and quit. Forever. Deleted that game--and my sore shoulders healed.
Limited examples but the pattern suggests two strong contributors to TK--one emotional, one mental.
- Intense feelings fuel telekinesis. Historically this is emphasized--poltergeists are associated with teens, sexual frustration, troubled families, abuse; miracles, with spiritual passion and crises.
- Believing telekinesis is possible, and contemplating it. Discussing it that day ups the odds... This factor is not much seen in the literature. My sample's small, but the association in my journals is consistent. TK gets more likely if you think it's possible. And who really does?
"... firm persuasion removed mountains;
but many are not capable of a firm persuasion of any thing."
Given how violent humans can get, maybe that's a blessing.