Circles of Bone
Dreamed 1977/4/27 by Linda Puffer
THAT DAY
San Francisco: I was staying with a friend, Maria Epes. She is an artist and a fine printer. We share an intense relationship with a strong emphasis on communication and intellectual curiosity. We are very close and during this period of time our friendship was particularly nurturing and inspirational.
On this evening Maria had spoken of her mother and said that she has her mother's backbone. It is a shared physical trait. She said that her mother is a survivor, that her backbone is that of a survivor, and that it is noticeable because it stands out clearly, prominently beneath the skin. Maria admires her mother immensely.
I admire Maria.
THAT NIGHT
Maria is in my dream. I am telling her my thoughts about how glad I am for our friendship. She is leaving her apartment, standing at the head of the staircase. I walk over, embrace her.For several days I couldn't stop thinking about the dream, the image of me with that bone sticking out from my left side, and my fascination with what Maria had said about her mother's backbone. I wrote the poem for Maria.The next scene recalled occurs in her study where I sleep in a corner on the lounge. I awake several times. When I awoke the last time and get up, I realize that a bone is protruding from the area between my left breast and armpit. It doesn't hurt, yet, but I don't understand how it happened. I place Maria's hand on my breast and ask her to feel the bone. Then I tell Ed (man with whom I live) about it but he is not sympathetic. He doesn't think it's serious and is not interested. I am unable to get anyone to understand what it is--something sticking out from my heart. I decide that the bone is actually a piece of my left rib which has slipped or pushed itself up so that it curves over my left shoulder. I cannot tell if it is broken. I awoke with it this way. As time passes, it begins to hurt.
Circles of Bone
backbone
whitebone fishbone crossbone you have your mother's backbone slivered silvered arc of bone your mother's backbone prominent ridged beneath thin skin you have no backbone stand up straight pierces your heart that bone trombone with this bone I thee wed bone to bone bleached bones skull bones throw the dog a bone bone of contention you have your mother's backbone |
live close to bone
close to the bone spare lean look you have no lover spare throwing bones you must believe they tell bare truths as dog strips bone clean you have your mother's backbone all we need to know of circles is written in our bones bones alone remain we build our graves for bones backbones blackbones we bear our mothers' backbones |
SOURCE: Dreamworks: an Interdisciplinary Quarterly (v.1, no.2, summer 1980, p.158-9)
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