I dreamt ghosts visited us, and for each scream, a relative would die.
Two of us cried out. That morning the first letter came...
A late-night conversation with the proud developer
of a new concept in South Asian convenience dining...
I'm kissed by the Holy Aardvark, but my bond with my dad is strained by ESP he can't accept...
1: On a mid-Atlantic islet, a farm family plays music to summon the Greek god Pan. It works!
2: A mystical picturebook shows Pan & his mermaid lover. Again I'm told music summons Pan!
CAUTION: GOAT-GOD NUDITY
I'm a middle-aged British writer in a triad with a sculptor and a dairy farmer
who seem happy sharing me. But it's a small town, so we must be discreet...
CAUTION: TRIAD THAT WORKS
I was led into the future, where all the buffalo disappeared, to meet a frail old man by a ranch house...
Businessmen grow snouts or short trunks and their necks stretch.
They drive VW Beetles with the sunroof open. Works in summer, but...
The pecking order (goring order?) of cows explains why our leaders stink...
DAY: I admire Hannah Hinchman's watercolors of Montana and Vad Yakovlev's digital art of Equestria.
DREAM: I meet & sketch a coyote girl, a whack-a-mole mare, and a leering herder of shadowsheep...
Two men down at a rodeo. The velociraptors and pterosaurs draw near.
To scare them off, I need to do something alarming, impossible...
That levitating bear's not tightrope-walking--she rides a goat strung like soap-on-a-rope. A goat that's me! I'm eating...
CAUTION: UGH!
A farmer dreamt his new cow grew wings and flew away. Next day, he sold that cow at a heavy loss. Walking
home with the cash, he found a tame falcon, and tied its leg to his moneybag. One guess what the bird did...
A girl and I climb a half-built tower to get some privacy from my nosy, sneering parents.
But they find us during oral sex, and their scorn melts my girlfriend into a goat...
CAUTION: SEX, HUMILIATION, FAMILY VALUES
Walking around my brother's farm, I met this goat with a human head. He'd been playing with matches...
As a boy I dreamt I was trapped in a wooden chair, paralyzed, as a stampede
rushed toward me, just as my grandmother was paralyzed and chair-bound...
I'm three women at once! We marry a unicorn, a goat philosopher,
and a magic talking cat. But cops raid our furry commune...
CAUTION: INTERSPECIES MARRIAGE, TEEN SEX, BAD COPS
A sexy gene-sculpted singer (an ex-cow on her 4th body) solves the riddle that's stumping Mr Spock...
Protestors occupy the Transamerica Pyramid and install a cow as CEO... a Cash Cow?
I'm in Santa Cruz with my friend, a shocking-pink stuffed toy cow
with sewed-on accessories: big red lips, a floral wig, and a third eye. I wake,
draw the dreamcow--and my sister calls from Santa Cruz to sing me a song about...
I visit Shangri-La, the ancient Tibetan valley of refuge. Unicorns graze. We
drive around on car-sheep. Robin Hood rebels against the Priestess of Gloom.
Pilgrims in silly gauze robes arrive. Or are they just tourists? Oh, well. Toga party!
CAUTION: GAUZE ROBES, NUDE UNICORNS
Floundering through the snows of 1917, I fall in love with actress
Linda Evans, who is a sheep teaching ballet. When I wake...
1: Purple squid saboteurs flood our cliffhouse. 2: My oyster-ranching girlfriend has a snobby aunt.
3: I wake in a stranger's bondage fantasy--ugh! 4: Shepherds on the sea-floor watch for gliderwolves...
CAUTION: EMBARRASSING BONDAGE DREAM
A gigantic herd of buffalo stampede toward me. I panic, then surrender in peace to what is surely my death...
My friend Tanya tries hard to save her marriage, but in her dreams Isidora Duncan,
Carl Jung, even the gods themselves warn her to face their deep incompatibility...