A tall busty girl's younger, part-unicorn friend starts developing breasts at last. She makes
boob jokes, mocking her own body to reassure her herdmate she's no competition...
CAUTION: SELF-PUTDOWNS
An indestructible camera relentlessly shows me what passengers feel on every crashing plane...
CAUTION: PAINFUL READING
I'm touring a gloomy, firelit Victorian mansion filled with icons and idols from every
faith in the world, while this funny theme song loops in my head. What is that song?
CAUTION: MUSLIM RANTER; EMBARRASSING SONG
DREAM: I write a book involving spies and Lord Snow, but give him a cover name: Artie Shaw.
TWO WEEKS LATER: My wife & I go on the Tonight Show; unexpectedly, Artie Shaw shows up!
I tell him the dream. He turns pale, saying "No one knows this--I wrote a book under the name..."
CAUTION: WILL BOTHER E.S.P. SKEPTICS
The "Amazement Park", as I dubbed it, was a building long as a football field and three floors high; you fly,
suspended, round an oval track, through a galaxy of images teaching that "sharing" is what matters...
I was a pregnant dancer on the Fertility Goddess's new TV show, but I was mad at her...
DREAM: I write a book involving spies and Lord Snow, but give him a cover name: Artie Shaw.
TWO WEEKS LATER: My wife & I go on the Tonight Show; unexpectedly, Artie Shaw shows up!
I tell him the dream. He turns pale, saying "No one knows this--I wrote a book under the name..."
CAUTION: WILL BOTHER E.S.P. SKEPTICS
I asked my dreams why my back hurt. They told me: pregnancy, marsupial pouches, snapping turtles...
I’ll win a house if I can survive a night in the Haunted Pavilion! But it turns out I’ve been here before--before I was born...
CAUTION: GHOST ORGY
I try to fly in my birdsuit before I have feathers! Can I? Starring the cast of Three's Company...
CAUTION: LAME SEXUAL INNUENDO TYPICAL OF THREE'S COMPANY
I finally admit who I am, and the truth is bitter...
CAUTION: GENDER DYSPHORIA, MENTION OF COPROPHAGY, POSSIBLE SITCOM SPOILER
I dream of a black & white TV show of a woman in a dance leotard. I whack the antenna and she pops into color.
Awake, I turn on the TV. Black & white image of TWO women in leotards. Whack the antenna. ONE pops into...
Our brains are really squid stuffed in a skulljar. I wake, see the image on TV. "So it's predictive!" I think.
Then I wake to find that too was a dream. "Not predictive!" I think. Until my friend turns on the TV, and...
Spies kidnap a girl and move her soul into a madwoman's body.
Can she survive? Recover? Thrive? The TV dance show helps...
I look down on scrawny centaurs with cropped manes & tails: butch minimalism. Unsexy! Then I'm
down among them. Now they have big eyes, luxuriant manes and tails: femme excess. I find this sexy...
CAUTION: CENTAUR NUDITY
I'm road-racing. I go over the edge of a slope. But brush slows the car just enough to save me...
Next day, on TV: Rockford's shoved in a car into a canyon. But brush slows the car just enough to...
I'm Bugs Bunny. I torment Daffy Duck till I learn that in many time-branches the New
Deal happened late... or never. I decide to prod a reluctant Franklin Delano Roosevelt...
CAUTION: FIRESIDE PETTING, DUCK TORTURE, BAD POLITICS
I find I'm a self-made... critter. A plushie sewn with zippers so I can stuff any bits of me that
seem flat or limp. But my filling's not cotton, polyester or foam. It's chocolate! So I have...
CAUTION: CRUDE DREAM, AWFUL PUN
Twin dreams of ghoulish games backstage at a theater.
And they anticipated real long-term ghoulishness...
CAUTION: SLOW DEATH
After seeing Christina Applegate in Married with Children, I dream I'm in bed with her. For
contraception, I open a little square packet with... a condom? Or is it a fast-food packet of...
CAUTION: SEXUAL THEME
I infiltrate the Cult of Cake. Novices drool over chocolate frosting
and hand over their life savings. It's a pyramid scheme! A food...
CAUTION: TRUMP REFERENCES; HIDEOUS PUN
I'm in Lawrence, Kansas, watching a TV ad for hemorrhoid cream that won't solve your nuclear war problems...
CAUTION: LANGUAGE; ADVERTISING; HUMAN EXTINCTION
Deer-mares join our theatre class. Adorable! Then pig people. Not adorable. I wake & sketch them.
Hear voices--sexy singing deer on TV! Wow, my dream was predictive! And then I wake AGAIN...
CAUTION: FURRY NUDITY
A demon invades our police station, takes over our captain and lieutenant, and pushes them to fight.
But I know demonic possession can't last long. Our copshow's special effects budget is too limited...
After a nature show on bears and a horror-parody film, I dream of a man and a demon toddler
in a sick relationship. At least it sickens all of us...
CAUTION: DEVIL AND PEDOPHILE: WHO'S CORRUPTING WHO?
CAFTAN: My ultra-conservative brother wears a caftan. No way!
I woke amused. But later that day, he gave me a Christmas present...
DICKENS: A voice rants "I love Dickens! It has to be Dickens!"
Next evening on Night Gallery, Agnes Moorehead begs for...
I dream of a TV sitcom with passive boytoys, dildo balloons & a relentless laughtrack...
CAUTION: OH, READ THE TITLE
I'm just old enough to recall forests of fishbones and dragonflies on every roof...
Dancers in weird costumes from around the world audition for a contest, but
the judge lets them all in, from silly to obscene. Next day, on Doctor Who...
CAUTION: POSSIBLY PREDICTIVE; CERTAINLY EMBARRASSING
In a museum, I absent-mindedly eat crumbly bricks I think are pastry; they really are rare soil-samples...
Three days later, I see a TV show I thought was on children. Wrong; it's on soil samples--that turn into eatables...
I urge a cafe to host a talented Tarot reader with an amazing aura, but the owner says
"Anyone can be psychic with practice." Oh? Can practice make you Einstein, too?
I'm trapped in a TV documentary on nuclear war! Better dive through a TV screen and find a safe sitcom...
Hide-and-seek on an alien world ends in a sexy encounter--and a startling insight on BELIEF...
CAUTION: SEX
The sixties. I'm at a party with Eydie Gormé and Sammy Davis Jr.
I get a laugh with a pun about para-keets/para-chutes/para-shoes...
Elegant, ancient, the tower rose into the clouds. Inside? Smoke & darkness. Workers roast meat...
Coastal unicorns are slender; inlanders bloat. Genes, diet, both? Inland bosses enslave their gracile minority.
Performing pets! Jesters caged, chained & handicapped to heighten the wonder they can do their art at all...
CAUTION: TROUBLING SOCIAL ANALOGIES
The first thing any beginner does with a paint program is behead someone. Why?
CAUTION: PAINFUL SPLINTERS
I'm a horse chosen by the gods to join a Friend-Ring--a group mind. That's great for
the street crazies I get to help heal. Not so great for me, injected with madness...
CAUTION: CRITIQUES THE CULT OF FRIENDSHIP
I face a barrage of deadly challenges out of every action film I've seen and every game I've ever played...
I win a prize on a gameshow, but collecting is another story, since the show is run from Hell...
George Jetson is married to Wilma Flintstone--though they're both big cats.
When George comes home high on mushrooms, he doubts what's on his bed...
CAUTION: CARTOON ADULTERY
A whimsical spook causes a chain of crashes--a pedestrian dodges an elephant, swerving a car
that shoves a cyclist into a luggage-wrangler whose rolling suitcase panics a dog who runs into...
I get a crush on two mare-girls--sunny palomino Goldie is cute,
but it's dark-silver, lunar Grimoire that really stuns me...
CAUTION: EQUINE NUDITY, ESP REFERENCES
A reporter interviews the guardian angel of my dead sister Jill in front of a
green screen. He's dissolving in grief--luminous holes show through...
I live through two teens' nightmares, then "wake" with them to find they were drugged by a third party! Why?
Then I'm with a cheery wagon-crew of flirting griffins & talking horses, pulling a cart made of grammar or logic.
Six days later... detailed images from both dreams appear on TV!
CAUTION: CREEPY, THEN SAPPY, THEN FREAKY
After a day of troubling conflicts over race & art, I dream I'm handed a hot, heavy, mossy head--is it art, or alive?
After seeing The Tempest with a tattooed Miranda, I dream she has a Cutie Mark on her flank--
a logo showing her life-purpose, her life-path. Except she's outgrowing it...
CAUTION: MILD NUDITY
Forced into a duel, I let my spirit fight for me using Boomerang Blades. But my
enemy becomes giant floating sticky lips! My spirit finds incarnation confusing...
I'm Mary Ann on Gilligan's Island. But the theme song repeats endlessly--not the later version with
my name, but the early one dismissing me and the Professor as and the rest. I wake up screaming...
I'm stuck on a jet full of cartoons. We get hijacked by a kid who just wants
pilot practice, and then a talking cactus counter-hijacks us...
CAUTION: THE F-WORD
The gameshow has two old men humping sextoys on the floor as the audience
watched. That wasn't the gross bit. It was when they released the hogs...
CAUTION: OBSCENE GAMESHOW. EVEN MORE THAN USUAL.
DREAM: my car has a fuel leak. Luckily, I carry around a crystal hot-water knob--
for beauty, not car repair. But I screw it in & stop the leak, fixing my 'drive'...
NEXT EVENING: turn on the TV news, and there's my hot water knob...
We're hiking in the Sangre de Cristos when a girl offers to show us how to be a wolf. We're
eager--until she turns wolf, bites us and leaps off a cliff! Furious, we stupidly follow her over...
CAUTION: NUDE FLYING WOLVES
I'm a slave dancer. I run for it, and make it over the border. But my owner comes looking for me...
CAUTION: NUDITY, SLAVE SOCIETY
An early self-portrait rebelling against my gender and trying on beauty to see what'd change...
On TV, the first Jungian anima to leave the unconscious is granting an interview. But the questions are...
After watching both Star Trek & Doctor Who, I find I'm held prisoner by the Rani
and her laser-toting tiger guards. So I meditate--and manifest a jetpack and a laser gun!
I never deduced I'm dreaming; it's not lucidity. It's simpler. What have I got to lose?
A pig-man hybrid--huge mouth, tiny body--happily eats trash, smirking as I pass...
Then a woman bends over to flash me, smirking, as a censorious Judge glares...
CAUTION: SCENE 1 GROSS, SCENE 2 SEXUAL
The will named a strange executor: a kangaroo. Turns out there's some logic to it:
executors need burglar-skills, and few quadrupeds can climb in bedroom windows...
I'm a blonde gameshow bimbo. Each week, I'm beaten up. Ha ha ha! But my bruises are real. At last, I...
CAUTION: GAMESHOW FROM HELL
Kitty, exhausted, stops fighting what's inside her, and lets herself die.
Crystalline alien worms burst out, growing till they loom over the spaceport...
CAUTION: ADDICTION ROOTED IN AVOIDANCE
I'm watching MTV. Laurie Anderson gets inside my remote control. I try to change channels
and she turns my head into an apple. I grope for a potato peeler, and carve a new mouth...
Sharon Stone kisses David Letterman, and his head starts distorting
as she rants about the film industry's baby-actor monopoly...
An idiot wizard lures car-sized spiders into town. I find a spellbook that repels them, but have to hide it
so my community college professors, Gandalf & Saruman, don't take it. For I'm no wizard, just a lizard...
CAUTION: HUGE SPIDERS, HUGE SELLOUTS
I befriend author Andre Norton--an ageless high-school kid writing enthused fan fiction, forever...
I find my Niche--the stone nook that decides if I'm a journeyman mage! Here comes my prophecy...
A bear-girl seduced by her coyote professor gets a
little advice on revenge from her anthropologist mom...
A TV crew invades the house, setting up for a special. I didn't expect to see a president on the work crew...
I dream squatters build surreal towers in a city of junk. I wake, go to a movie, and see...
After singing dream songs on stage, I dream of a girl on a talkshow displaying the strangest vagina in history...
CAUTION: NUDITY
At first it's Michael J. Fox flirting with me, and I'm not excited, he's kind of a loser. Then it all changes,
and he's a monster mosquito humping me, and I hear someone saying "Do me, do me." Him? Or me?
CAUTION: SUBTITLED "THE UNSEXIEST SEX DREAM EVER"
The 'toon actors from My Little Pony gleefully volunteer to die horribly in a TV documentary on the
impact in Yucatan that killed off the... dinosaurs? No! Unicorns, griffins, pegasi and dragons! As I
draw the dream, I get an email from the maker of a TV documentary on climate catastrophe...
1: I sketch two deer-girls making videos. 2: I pull a man's nose off, and milk the scene for drama before...
3: My old boss is convicted of murder! 4: I wake and two friends interpret #3 as "Overwork is killing you..."
I wake again. My dream-notebook's blank. No friends here; their interpretation was a dream too....
CAUTION: NUDE DEER
I see two Ohlone women around 1900, starving, naked, despised, their land stolen--and still way happier than...
CAUTION: NUDITY
I dream Public Broadcasting System actors rebel on camera and have an oral-sex orgy!
Next day, NPR has a call-in show, and suddenly they're arguing in favor of oral sex...
CAUTION: SEXUAL POLITICS
I'm trapped in the scary show The Outer Limits. A man scolds me: "You think not, but you MATTER!"
I try suicide rather than face my worth! But my dream fences off the river, forcing me to confront...
CAUTION: SUICIDE ATTEMPT
My last two businesses went bust. So I let a giant parrot talk me into interviewing
her people, who've been settling all those alien ruins in Amazonia. Great career move...
Turns out my life's a TV show. My scriptwriter is half pegasus, half dragon,
and my own humanity has been her science-fictional imagination all along...
CAUTION: FURRY NUDITY
My parents host a dinner party, but squeeze us all onto a piano stool. I plink away nervously.
The guests flee. My sister blames me, but I suspect it's my dad's pet crocodiles! Next day...
by Wayan; 2017/2/5, an advisory dream fusing Aldous Huxley & My Little Pony.
My new housemate Pinkie is a party animal, but she's really nice. She climbs a high ladder to help wash my
Windows of Perception. Then our unicorn friend Rarity walks in. She warns me to pace this renovation project...
CAUTION: PONIES
The child who runs with wild horses finds the secret spy-room of dreams! But no one's watching...
I'm listening to a film-talk on Non-Visualization. "Don't wish--don't will--don't visualize.
Just face what you really want, and then don't push..."
CAUTION: MYSTICAL
Quail, spelunking again, finds ancient cave paintings of the Cult of the Fossil TV...
Radar O'Reilly's teddy bear is stolen. He builds spy-planes to find it. One morning the camp wakes to find...
I'm in an alt-world Berkeley where mythic creatures shop on College Avenue. Marigold
the unicorn flirts with me. Rainbow Dash the pegasus has turned male. Very very male...
CAUTION: FURRY NUDITY (AND CRUDITY)
DREAM: I climb a stair to a surreal space where kids dance in tights spattered with wet red paint.
NEXT DAY: I watch Wednesday--Wednesday Addams dances & gets spattered with wet red paint...
CAUTION: NUDITY, ESP SPECULATION
DREAMS: 1: I can't afford language classes. 2: A beautyqueen rigs a stargate; I kill monsters & sell their bones...
NEXT DAY: I'm asked "Why don't you get a language degree?" I can't afford it! I go home & watch Dr Who...
A stunning girl fixes a spacetime portal. Smugglers kill alien monsters & sell their ashes as a drug...
CAUTION: VIOLENCE AND CREEPY DISPOSAL OF BODIES
Six women in six similar feudal empires swap places repeatedly. They can never meet,
but they can leave notes, each helping out the next soul to swap in...
CAUTION: ADVANCED DREAMWORK
After too much TV, I dream I'm plotting against a regime of suave, treacherous magical beings. But
a unicorn sorceress suggests I enlist the robots. She's right--they find plutocratic thaumocracy ugly...
CAUTION: ANTI-CAPITALIST
THAT DAY: My bandmates want to record crowd-pleasing songs. I want to record our strangest ones...
THAT NIGHT: In a woman's art studio, I'm struck by a low, feline, muscular unicorn mare, carved
out of a giant ruby. I ask, and she says "Oh, that's not mine. I found it in the trash"...
I'm autistic; a TV host encourages me and another autistic kid to have sex on the air...
CAUTION: UNDERAGE SEX ON NATIONAL TV; SERIOUS FINGER-POINTING
Nightmare: flying saucers attack, and I only have a squirt gun to fight back with!
Next day I see the Simpsons Halloween special. Lisa Simpson has a nightmare...
A friend nags me to be lookout as he steals a cult's papers. I know it'll end in murder, but foresight paralyzes me!
In a videogame that keeps freezing unplayably, I find a button calling up a secret screen of second chances...
I'm lost in a grim basement, but two kids show me a cobwebbed glass door you can walk through like air...
My sisters get bored with the game of power, so I watch TV--
until it melts, and a terrifying giant rises to chases me...
I'm a kid in Italian high school. A gifted classmate, Sheldon, provokes
bullies. He sues the school to stop it. The prosecutor's reluctant...
CAUTION: GIFTEDS AS A HATED MINORITY
I discover a Sorting Hat, as in Harry Potter--and it moves in with us. Our cat crawls in and plays peekaboo.
She becomes a teenager eager to get drunk at Thanksgiving--like every adult in her life. But she's not
puking drunk like them, so she must be OK! Just as I think I am--I only overwork to exhaustion.
CAUTION: DRUNK TEEN CAT, SEVERELY ALCOHOLIC ADULTS
A mom & daughter caught a squirrel robbing their guaranteed rodent-proof birdfeeder. He
speaks English so they demand to know how he did it. But he knows they won't hurt him...
Illusionist Penn Jillette pulls a large-scale prank with an ending not even I see coming...
The traditional figure is blindfolded, holding two crossed swords. I used crossed TV antennae...
A beer-soaked cowboy barbecue goes wrong when a dog named Teri Garr catches fire
and they just laugh and won't waste beer to douse her. Then their big old hats catch fire...
CAUTION: SEXIST BLAMING OF VICTIM; PROBABLE DEATHS BY FIRE
As a kid, my nightmares were of Sesame Street characters. In my teens I graduated to
slasher nightmares and recurring lucid dreams. Alcohol trashed my dreams for years, but
now they're not nightmares--just surreal. Hitler wrecks my sex life! What a spoilsport...
CAUTION: (MOSTLY FRUSTRATED) SEX
DAY: I hear Angela Duckworth (writer of Grit) talk on positive thinking. She thinks we're our own worst enemies.
DREAM: I test my grit an African savanna--and outbluff lions! Unfortunately, that Siberian tiger won't be bluffed...
CAUTION: TROUBLING ASSESSMENT OF... PUTIN? BULLIES IN GENERAL?
Arboreal marsupials with megaphones narrate a Polynesian documentary, while
the rare translucent lobster sings its death song, sacrificing itself for lunch
CAUTION: WILL CAUSE VEGETARIANISM
A "friend" gives me her TV. No wonder! Turns out it's haunted
by a small-minded devil who cheats on all his deals...
1: I failed to save a magic tree. It fell and killed someone. I'm racked with guilt...
2: A giant pinball game on a tilted oval relief-map. But you can only win as a team of six friends...
3: A Caribbean girl with a weird aura tries to align two magic crystals to heal herself...
CAUTION: BREASTS, MY LITTLE PONY AS ROLEMODEL
I'm a girl living alone in a forest. I go patrolling after a storm and find a red cable
strangling a tree. Though scared, I climb up and tear it off. But there are more...
CAUTION: POLITICAL INTERPRETATION
DAY: the crew of the Enterprise sings about love & career(ism). DREAM: I'm taking a test at Starfleet Academy.
But my teacher's a gorgeous unicorn, & my answers are filled in! I try to change one but my eraser breaks...
CAUTION: MOCKS LA BERGE'S LUCID DREAMWORK? NUDE PROFESSOR, TOO
A man enslaves a unicorn and makes her split time, for his profit! But the timeforks
don't heal as he expected. So the unicorn takes unilateral action (sorry).
Those time-forks look like our current political war. Prepare for sharp kicks...
Our landlady was a friend, but she broke our rental agreement. Talk, compromise, or rent strike?
Trapped in a blend of Joan of Arcadia and The Tempest Tales, I'm tired of being the pratfall sidekick...
Robot wolves with videocamera eyes prowl our block, freezing me
in their headlight glare. Why do I think one's my ex-girlfriend?
Blondie Wiggle builds a Video Igloo. But I'm allergic--TV kills me! A BAD omen for our video project...
CAUTION: TV KILLS (BUT YOU KNEW THAT)
A TV documentary shows the history of war. Or does it? In what war did great clouds of flame
swallow sailing ships? Every scene they show is a natural disaster. Why are they lying?
I'm a demon girl out to sabotage a pirate radio station by climbing a tall
wall of glowing wax, carrying a comatose mountain lioness on my back!
I dreamed I was a whale swimming against a Christian ebb tide,
trying to lead humans to a cleaner spiritual current...
CAUTION: HARD ON AMERICAN CHRISTIANITY
DREAM: Witchmare the sorceress patiently wins over Twilight, a unicorn who thought she was straight.
NEXT NIGHT: at a queer picnic, I find I know my orientation--witches! But I'm less sure what sex I am...
CAUTION: LESBIANS, UNICORNS, FANART, COMPLEXITY
Our dilemma is, now that we have the power to get what we want... what exactly was it we wanted?
DREAM: I'm in Yellowstone, in a monstrous resort. Local tribes fight white exploitation of sacred land.
NEXT MORNING: I read a Native American critique of racist land-theft in a TV show: Yellowstone...