Our gifted class is on a field trip. Our teacher happily explains we're going to wreck a freeway,
tying up traffic for months, to protest crappy gifted programs...
CAUTION: SLOWEST DREAM INTERPRETATION EVER
She was headed for a rock wall. The brakes faded; she smelled burning.
Then she woke. Her friends laughed, but she asked a neighbor what to do if...
I'm in a gypsy wagon that always creeps north; to break the spell, I need an arctic unicorn.
Four days later, at work at the library, a new book appears: Nancy Luenn's Arctic Unicorn...
DREAM: to stop an idiotic bout of war-fever, I have to take on the power of the Goddess herself...
NEXT DAY: I stumble on a fantasy book, Ariel, full of details straight out of the dream...
THAT NIGHT: I sign the Unicorn Commitment, but personalize the magical contract...
CAUTION: DISSES REAGAN & SOUTHERN MASCULINITY
My dead friend Charlie and his sister and I are driving around
Lake Erie. We know it’s a dream and he’s dead, and yet we’re joyous...
I burst into tears for no reason and for 15 minutes begged my brother-in-law not to go, then said...
CAUTION: GRUESOME
I'm biking in a construction zone behind a car with a rounded top like a VW Beetle
but with a flared skirt like a bell. It stops. I brake but go right up that fringe over the roof...
I dream I've decided to jog to Alaska. But that Arctic wind slows me, and then a traffic-snarl boxes me in...
Awake, I bike to work. Distracted by the dream, I leave my coat. An Arctic blast slows me, and then a...
I'm road-racing. I go over the edge of a slope. But brush slows the car just enough to save me...
Next day, on TV: Rockford's shoved in a car into a canyon. But brush slows the car just enough to...
Businessmen grow snouts or short trunks and their necks stretch.
They drive VW Beetles with the sunroof open. Works in summer, but...
He saw a vehicle coming toward him at great speed. The light was so bright it blinded him. He screamed...
I don't even notice the car until it's hit me and I'm dead. Now I have to lie here
forever, even though I know it's a dream. But if you die in a dream, you die...
I dreamed I was a classic hippie bus. My brother was a lovingly customized Mustang. We
were real collector's items. So our parents decided to sell us. Their asking price was...
I DREAM: I'm at the scene of a fatal car crash. They thought it was Johnny Carson, but it's his brother Dick.
I WAKE: On the news: Johnny Carson's son Dick died in a car crash. The scene looks like my dream...
CAUTION: WILL TROUBLE E.S.P. SKEPTICS
What my home town will become, if you fools keep burning gas and spewing CO2...
I find myself driving a speeding car down a freeway--in reverse. No, not reverse gear...
An over-eager landscaper mows my dad's new beard, unasked. Debate in court!
Is the art of mowing free speech, or is your face your castle?
I dreamt the royal coach got stuck in an arch on the coronation route. Awake, I checked the heights of coach & arch...
I escape a dark cell, cram with friends into a car and co-drive to LA, steering along with a woman in my lap...
CAUTION: EITHER SEX SYMBOLISM, OR SOMETHING MORE SUBVERSIVE
I'm on vacation, but cultists lick my feet--then turn on me, casting stones. But they miss.
So I wander the steppe for centuries, until I come to the City of Texas...
Night. Rain. A hansom cab. The horse slips on the wet pavement, toppling the cab with my husband inside.
I woke sure it happened. Next morning a postman tried to tell me of the crash, but I told him...
My dad drives recklessly, hits a copcar hard, smashing our front end. I wake
knowing it says "Kay's a batterer. Leave her or I'LL be smashed." That day...
CAUTION: NIGHTMARE, BATTERING ISSUES
I cross a hostile continent to a magic commune, fall in love with a flying girl who slaps a
soul-spark into my head, and follow an alien goddess leading the Dance of the Sun...
I was big as the world, so whole cars fit in my vagina. But men were selling women
to supermarkets, to be cooked & resold. So I crossed the Atlantic sea-floor on foot...
CAUTION: CAR SEX. NO, NOT SEX IN CARS...
I become a werewolf and climb into a strange attic. I find a grave marker for
an old friend--but her death date is two years in the future...
General De Gaulle gives me a ride in his armchair with the plexiglass
roof. Alarming--since he drives backward at full speed...
I'm in a car with Walt Disney. A blonde comes in out of the rain.
He promises to make her a star, and puts his hands...
CAUTION: NOT GRAPHIC, JUST UGH
I get a job in China teaching bus-driving dogs how to fly. I don't know how. Luckily, the dogs...
Mother & daughter both dream Mum runs over a little girl. Next morning she
spots the girl in the road--warned, she swerves. But bystanders see no child...
I ride my tricycle all round Sydney trying to get bureaucratic approval
to feed bananas to my friend the grizzly bear, gooey though he gets...
After a hard day getting a "free" bed, I dream my milker comes to drain my dreams.
Wait...did I agree to this? Or does milking drain objections, too?
CAUTION: CREEPY
I drive around hunting for my car, but even though it's a bright red rental car
I can't spot it anywhere. From my car. From my bright red car...
I asked my dreams to show me my Shadow--what I deny. It showed me at least FIVE! And in every
time-branch, a runaway truck crushed me--the Truck of Ideology. Not that I seemed able to avoid it...
CAUTION: RECURRING DEATHS
Pa warns me to protect my paws. Then gilt wounds my sole. Then
a lioness eats a tasty drumstick. Then a bus crashes on our corner--for real!
At my mechanic's garage, a child prodigy rebuilds a car engine. Gawking, I nearly plow into the crowd...
A dream-friend blames me for nothing. I wake, and TWO friends blame me for...
Patagia dreams she fakes a Hindu rite, causing Electra to dream she fakes leadership in a refugee band. But are they faking?
My car's idling too fast. After hours of diagnosis, I notice a foot's on the gas! But not my foot...
Am I on this ship's bridge, or only watching on video? It matters, because that other ship
half a mile ahead just exploded, and the shockwave's about to crush us like a soda can...
CAUTION: NUCLEAR DISASTER
Parking structures with spiral ramps are, secretly, screws harvesting motion from parking cars, slowly drilling
into near-impenetrable rock. Thus are skyscraper-foundations made...
WAYAN: I dream a transparent ghost steals my sister Miriel's white VW bug...
MIRIEL: I dream about a ghost and my old white VW bug that was stolen...
CAUTION: E.S.P. CLAIM
A whimsical spook causes a chain of crashes--a pedestrian dodges an elephant, swerving a car
that shoves a cyclist into a luggage-wrangler whose rolling suitcase panics a dog who runs into...
Dream: a woman wants to drive my old hippie bus. But a tire's missing! She pushes. I don't think it's safe...
Next evening: my housemate wants to drive my old hippie bus. She pushes, but I don't think it's safe...
In a worldwide junkyard full of warring spooks, I finally meet the one whose message I need to hear...
My grandma couldn't drive, but after she died, I dreamt she drove my brother Bill and me
around--speeding, in fact. When I told him the dream, he filled in details--he'd dreamt it too!
Just singing about the antigravitree lightens me. I bound around town. But then I find a diseased antigravitree is
holding me down. It's become a gravitree! Gotta clear out that deadwood, no matter how messy, if I want to fly...
A woman dreams of her boyfriend recently killed in a car crash. Unremarkable so far. But he
also haunts his ex-babysitter, two thousand miles away, who had no idea he'd died...
I live through two teens' nightmares, then "wake" with them to find they were drugged by a third party! Why?
Then I'm with a cheery wagon-crew of flirting griffins & talking horses, pulling a cart made of grammar or logic.
Six days later... detailed images from both dreams appear on TV!
CAUTION: CREEPY, THEN SAPPY, THEN FREAKY
The Feds order my friend Mike to hand them a Frenchman we haven't seen in years. Mike substitutes a junk VW...
I grope for the name of an island. I dream I crash a car on a bridge; it hangs with one wheel over. I wake & recall a friend who moved to Canada.
Breakfast. That island's on the front page. Inside's a photo of that hanging car. A letter comes--the first from my Canadian friend in years.
Each might be coincidence, but what do we call it when coincidence goes on and on?
I crash my car on the way to therapy. I ask my dream why. And it tells me! Deliberate, but not suicidal...
I paddle through the grim streets of Karachi on my belly, on a skateboard,
with my flipper-hands, until at last I reach the border to a Higher Realm...
Driving down a country road, I go lucid. A gorgeous hitchhiker appears. I'm tempted, but I decide to try for something higher than
a sex dream. The car takes off, climbs past religious symbols into a clear sky where I find myself singing a transcendent hymn...
I dream of a parade or train of energy sources--human muscle, horsepower, coal, oil, gas, solar...
But the train's ultimate engine is in our future, and is impossible--a dragon riding a broomstick...
I dreamt I hit & killed a small boy in the road. Weeks later in Manchester I swerved & just missed that boy...
A book claims Hitler led not a political party but a cult out to apply mystical theories--like Manson! Then I dream...
CAUTION: BIG RANT, SMALL DREAM
DREAM: my car has a fuel leak. Luckily, I carry around a crystal hot-water knob--
for beauty, not car repair. But I screw it in & stop the leak, fixing my 'drive'...
NEXT EVENING: turn on the TV news, and there's my hot water knob...
I'm wrapping my heavy-metal eggs too slowly, so the Judges sink my car! I set out to get revenge...
My little daughter and I hardly notice when a truck kills us. Unseen, I calmly observe the alarm of the living...
I tour the heart of a red supergiant, where dreaming souls explore
their fears and heart's desires, unconstrained by solid matter...
CAUTION: SWEDENBORGIAN VISION, UNICORN NUDITY
I'm trapped in a mad scientist's car that squeezes through wall-cracks. But when
she aims at a wall with NO cracks, I have to pull out the smuggled alien device
in my pocket. Just before impact I switch on the Inertial Damper...
DREAM: in my car, the window crank turns on its own; my invisible girlfriend is crawling
out the window! She's turned so quiet & private. Have I seen the last of her? Well, not seen...
NEXT DAY: I stumble on a one-off manga about an invisible girl; but the artist writes "I
decided not to make her a regular--too quiet & private, & I can't draw her feelings"...
CAUTION: GLASSY NUDITY, E.S.P. SPECULATION
I feel a drag, and take off my safety belt. I find I've been towing an invisible buggy with two men in it...
An Arabian prince kidnaps my girlfriend and me. We eventually escape his flying palace, but she gets trapped in
Victorian underwear, while I escape feuding politicians by turning myself into a truck tire. NOT a smart move...
CAUTION: BOGUS VICTORIAN SEX-EUPHEMISMS
I suddenly knew I had to get off the bus and wait for the next. We passed the first bus, on fire...
I was at Thanksgiving dinner when I felt my mother dying two thousand miles away...
After watching the Kavanaugh confirmation hearings for the Supreme Court, with their rape accusations,
I dream of a reckless driver named Kevin who runs down a skateboarder and blames everyone else...
CAUTION: KAVANAUGH SUPPORTERS WON'T LIKE THIS
DREAM: I run into a couple I know. I get gridlocked. R.D. Laing gives me a transpersonal message.
DAY: I bump into that couple, get gridlocked, and hear R.D. Laing speak on transpersonal messages...
I'm caught in a surreal traffic jam--balky horses, teeny cop cars. Get so stressed that I split
into a big creature guarding a small human sleeper. But even sleep is now a crime...
CAUTION: PREDICTIVE?
I was one of just three to survive a roller coaster crash. I dreamed of a playful, laughing girl who drove off a cliff.
Dead, she lay on a bier in a surreal cemetery. But she woke and looked at photos of her old self with curiosity...
I'm lying on a foam pad in a Volkswagen bus I remember from years ago
when a lizard half a meter long dances up to perch on my shoulder...
How the hell do I summarize this? Lola, a werefox I'm hot for, becomes my feudal Japanese brother, and
her fox-shape reappears as the truck-driving maid for a Han Dynasty lady. We counter the interdimensional
energy vampires by importing ghost unicorns on sailing ships, who have an orgy. Two weeks later,
it all comes true. Literally? No, but closer than you'd think....
De Bray dreamed a speeding car nearly hit him; a month later, he abruptly recognized the street from his dream and paused...
I dreamed the bus lurched, cracking my skull. Next day, on the bus steps as in my dream, I braced myself, and...
Wayan makes love to Martha's double, then sees her soul watching from the shadows...
Barbara can't reach Wayan to say farewell...
Martha falls off a mountain and decides to let herself die, just to see what happens...
CAUTION: SEX, ABUSE ISSUES
My "friends" pull me away from the girl of my dreams, push booze & pot at me,
and won't even try to climb the rope to success. But Marvin saves Evel Knievel
from a motorcycle crash. Sounds good--until, ten years later, I hear how Marvin died...
CAUTION: GRIM AFTERMATH
Wayan dreams he and his sister grope toward sex in the kitchen, when two of her friends burst in...
Miriel dreams she's having sex with a boy from her choir, when two of her friends burst in...
CAUTION: FRUSTRATION, INCEST, CAUGHT IN SEX
DREAM: Gay boys, underage girls & my own sister all mock me, sure I want their forbidden sexual fruit
at a beach where grotesque trees make their own precipitation and salt-dunes spill into saturated, toxic brine...
NEXT DAY: I read Margaret Atwood's The Salt Garden--sex, guilt, and grotesque trees in saturated, toxic brine.
CAUTION: SEXUAL GUILT, EXHIBITIONIST TWEENS, APPARENT E.S.P.
I'm back in the suburbs, but decades have passed. My mom's really old & blind.
Yet I insist she should drive the car, not me. She pulls out in front of a huge truck...
My mom's driving me to work. A nearby car has young people in it--I'd rather be with them.
My mom seems to be dawdling; I'll be late meeting my colleague! I'm furious...
I visit a beautiful artificial mountain with loved ones--but my demons overwhelm me one by one.
CAUTION: SUICIDAL FEELINGS, BODY HATE/FATPHOBIA, IMPLIED RAPE
I commute to my dreamjob on a four-story bus; then my baby brother
(who I wouldn't let eat any chocolate pudding) utters a new poem by William Blake...
MY DREAM: I was walking a hilly road, my uncle ahead, my stepdad behind; trying to keep them in sight. My mom appeared and I woke.
MY MOTHER'S: the same. She told me hers before I told her mine. She thought it meant my uncle would die first, then me, then...
CAUTION: APPARENT TELEPATHY, BUT MISINTERPRETED MEANING
My mom and I road-duel an alien beetle, then investigate a deepspace Marie Celeste;
then I spy for the Angevin Empire to protect the Crown Jewels...
On my side of the fence, Austrian winter--gray skies, snow. On the other, warm sun, and a frighteningly beautiful
German woman. She invites me over the border, to join her--and the terrified people being dragged off in carts to...
CAUTION: HOLOCAUST HINTS
I'm in Santa Cruz. Low on gas, but the pumps died. Hwy 17, the route home, is blocked. Drive back roads on fumes...
Next day: a friend's in Santa Cruz. The power goes out, pumps don't work, 17's blocked. He drives back roads...
Erica dreams that during a protest she's caught in a radioactive flood...
Michael dreams a nuclear forcefield makes his fingertips explode and congeal into weird knobs...
Joanne dreams she meets nuclear mutants with curling black nails great for peeling potatoes...
Scott dreams the world goes silent and white, bleaching out. His hands dissolve...
A man's stalking me and my friends. We try to escape but a circus is in the way.
My friends shrink to babies, so I pop them in a stroller and flee over steep hills,
bouncing down stone stairs! "OW!" the babies howl! Hey... why do I feel deja vu?
CAUTION: INTERPRETATION INSULTS BOTH RUSSIA AND NATO
I'm car-buying. My friend has an Opel, but it's sluggish AND a gas hog. How can a car be both? Then...
I notice a jar of opals that my grandpa gave me has grown dull with algae! Sheesh, more opals gone bad...
I wake and head to work. But at a bottleneck, I'm blocked by this loud group talking on and on about...
In occupied Germany, Pat flags down two friends just before a truck crash. Except...
Pat was in England at the time. She sensed they were in danger, but...
Pete told me to skip the shortcut. Only after I'd turned the truck around did I realize Pete had died weeks ago...
DREAM: our car's been acting funny. Turns out it's a severe electrical drain.
NEXT DAY: my housemate discovers what's been making our car act funny...
At thirteen, I dreamed a van crashed right at the spot where my best friend always met me after school.
The next day we went to see what'd happen. I suggested we stand across the road just to be safe...
Drowsing on the bus, I see great holes open in the pavement. Our bus falls in. We climb out to find devastation...
I wake and get off the bus. A few days later, I see my nightmare on the news: that massive quake in Alaska...
I'm sitting in a car teetering in the front row of a theater balcony. By me, R. is licking a cherry-
flavored sucker. As the film crew yells "Roll it!" my foot slips on the brake and I do...
The mayor declares war on bikers, blames us for gridlock! I dream of Rosa Parks' influence and realize...
Gloom clung to me & I skipped the dance. I begged Frances to ride in a safe car, but coming home...
I dreamed of a woman whose jeep stalls on the Antarctic ice. Along comes the ghost of a Volkswagen...
New moons appear. I try to mash them into a spare Earth, but botch the orbits.
So now, runaway moons rumble down a steep San Francisco hill...
CAUTION: ALWAYS SET PARKING BRAKE
Dream: a fair and swap meet out on the salt flats, full of scruffy bikers. One of them is... ME?
Next day: I'm shown a photo of a fair & swapmeet on salt flats full of scruffy bikers...
I visit Shangri-La, the ancient Tibetan valley of refuge. Unicorns graze. We
drive around on car-sheep. Robin Hood rebels against the Priestess of Gloom.
Pilgrims in silly gauze robes arrive. Or are they just tourists? Oh, well. Toga party!
CAUTION: GAUZE ROBES, NUDE UNICORNS
I cross San Francisco on public transit--a network of children's slides. One leads into...
A wormhole full of aliens, where a goofy-haired reporter interviews a hacker...
I dreamed of speckled eggs, Caribbean drug traffickers and of
almost drowning near a sinking boat...
On the freeway, my car and I split into quantum possibilities. I steer both entangled cars
till I split again--now I have to steer three cars with just one pair of hands and eyes...
DAY: a stranger screams "BITCH! Plant a TREE!" Thinks I'm female and wants to fight over an old bumper sticker?
DREAM: I'm a horse detective. In shades, lipstick, & high heels I try to pass as a mare. Absurd! A stallion in drag...
CAUTION: HORSE NUDITY. OH WAIT, THAT'S NORMAL.
He said "Oh, Mom, I had a terrible dream. A car ran me down."
I said we could not live by dreams or we live a life of horror...
A stone bridge, at the crossing of a road and a river. A signal sign indicates the name of the place: (YOU)...
Repeated attempts to move a gigantic, sacred, saucerlike stone all failed; but now,
with the world's biggest cranes, we get it on a truck. It crawls past adoring crowds...
I'm a bike courier. I take a packet of fifty potent dreams
up Dream Street and deliver them to the year 1980...
Girls flash and strip and crawl into bed with me, but I'm blind to their interest--
till I become a snakeboy and discover the real limitations of phallic symbolism...
CAUTION: NUDITY, STUPIDITY
1: Three sisters flash me; one has a third eye in there! Clothed, it's blind. Was she just enlightening herself?
2: In the future, most cars self-drive. I'm the last driver using my own muscles and mind. Can I hold out?
3: A friend charts all of history's wars to prove: democracies don't fight each other. So to get peace...
CAUTION: NAKED EYE
I find three street parties full of half-naked dancers, jammed together for warmth--and maskless!
Not parties--anti-masker events. Sexy, but their protest risks our lives along with theirs...
CAUTION: FLAMES SCIENCE DENIERS
An article claimed smell is rare to absent in dreams. My dreams felt insulted and sent me a stinky one!
But why THAT stink? Well... next morning on my way to work...
DREAM: a car crash; my parents both die, though my sister & I are thrown free, unhurt.
DAYS LATER: Aunt & uncle invite me on a car trip; my dad says no, I have to study.
TWO WEEKS LATER: Aunt & uncle die in a head-on; their kids are thrown free...
A hero has solved all Earth's problems. Now what? A trucker friend invites him on a road trip to Mars...
I'm on a trip to who knows where, with my young-again mom, my dead dad, and--who's that guy?
The manhunt is on for Donald Trump, rich sociopath. But he too is pursuing something: happiness...
I'm a flying fox in England. I see a poisoning and call for help. Ugly knockoffs of
Peanuts characters attack me! The real Peanuts gang defeats them; Snoopy drives
the victim to the hospital, saving her. It really is vital to be... authentic.
CAUTION: PUNS
A fiddler has recurring dreams warning he'll be run over with his violin. Reluctantly,
He sells it to a friend, and jams with him only in the woods, away from cars. But...
After seeing Julia Wertz's cartoon history of her entire dreamlife (on one big page!) I dream
Wertz style all night! I don't mind the nightmares--what gets me down is comics' black & white...
CAUTION: NIGHTMARES, SEX
A road trip with no road--levitating over the Arctic Sea to meet the Whale Philosopher.
Then it's time for us all to bike to the stars, leave this world behind...
I dreamed my husband told me he'd been in a car crash and was in a frozen ditch not visible
from the road near our house. I woke and called 911 who found him just twenty minutes later...
I'm stuck on a runaway bus. So we decide to picture the axle falling off, and
it obeys! But the bus zooms on, carried by a horde of little animals...
CAUTION: ESP SKEPTICS WILL LOATHE THE AFTERWORD (true story, though)
1: Dad picks up Bigfoot; he bites off my ear. 2: Dad abandons me in a canyon full of wolves. 3: The man who
killed my family hands me his ax. 4: Bees move into my pillow. 5: A marionette with razor-nails lures me close...
CAUTION: OUCH
I'm a Chinese kid fleeing the Japanese Occupation in 1938. As we near San Francisco,
I wake to find it's all my dad's dream. Wait--he's alive again? But he was never a refugee.
Is it a pastlife memory? If so, whose--his or mine?
I feel horrified--how publishers will batten on the sufferings of junkey musicians... unbearable...
DAY: I work way too much--art projects plus helping a friend get her lost data back...
DREAM: A gun nut threatens me, so I claim I bent his gun. Really I just bent spacetime.
He flees atop his toy car, letting it steer--it's smarter than he is. That car winks at me...
DREAM: I witness a murder on a farm. So I hide in the fields as assault-gun bullets fly...
NEXT DAY: I go see a love story set on a farm. But suddenly killers show up
to eliminate a witness to a murder. Assault rifles in the cornfields...
CAUTION: VIOLENCE & APPARENT E.S.P.
I was nineteen again, riding my horse down a bad road in Virginia. After three hours, my horse spoke up...