Are dreams really so ephemeral? Lewis Carroll, who built the Alice books from dream-fragments, wasn't so sure...
Aristotle keeps marrying my friends and fucking them up. So I challenge Mr. Logic to a shamanic duel...
CAUTION: THE F-WORD. OOPS, TOO LATE! LESBIAN FISH, TOO.
A jaundiced dream of an art show that spelled out just how deeply I reject the rules behind modern art...
When I met someone attractive, my head flamed, burning my body like a wax candle...
A human pinball game played in the dark, with bells for stoppers, sorting people into a Gaussian bell-curve...
I'm a fairy queen at the beach, chasing a girl who's a strong swimmer. Yep, she swims beyond the buoys...
CAUTION: BAD LESBIAN PUNS
We unearthed a sacred treasure, but now a mob of believers are out to lynch us! I better fly...
CAUTION: SACRILEGE AND BAD PUNS
A sexy pool-playing friend in a short skirt leans over an invisible, virtual-reality pooltable, but I'm blind to...
CAUTION: EXHIBITIONISM, TRULY CLUELESS GUY
On the waterfront, I meet a seductive girl. Well, guy. Well, serial killer. Um, I think I'll leave now...
CAUTION: HOMOPHOBIA OR SURVIVAL INSTINCT?
Soul-Poodle is torn between Le Bone Dieu and Dancing Pussy. Who will our horny dogma chase?
CAUTION: MUTT SMUT
I know I'm a murderer; what isn't so clear is what I killed and why...
CAUTION: DISMEMBERMENT, GUILT, DREAD
I was in the Stanford Bookstore and saw this strange visual pun across the room... or did I?
CAUTION: MILD NUDITY
My evil twin, Boris Badenov, wants $8000 or else. I ask my dreams for a solution, and get one...
The moon invites me to go flying, but I get tired of magic and just want to go shopping...
Dreams warning of mania and paralyzing shame alternate with calm dreams of life and growth...
Malevolent artwork terrorizes my baby and me! What's to be done?...
My cat keeps going into heat and sneaking out for sex with my godmother's pet crab, and...
CAUTION: SEX, BAD PUNS, CRABBINESS
My foxy lover teases and tempts, but I can't let him into the patio for fear he'll hurt the rabbits…
CAUTION: UNFUNNY BUNNY PUNS
A visit to the Conches, a strange race who are only people intermittently, seasonally...
The pecking order (goring order?) of cows explains why our leaders stink...
While going through a painful breakup, I kept having sexy, lucid, psychic dreams...
Wayan dreams of surprising Dawn on the toilet while she dreams that flushing away evidence of Foul Play won’t work...
A catalog of American addictions and the absurd distinctions we make between them....
CAUTION: EMBARRASSING DRUG LIST
I'm actress Nicole Kidman, clinging to the dome of City Hall like King Kong, ripping it to shreds! Why?
CAUTION: VANDALISM, REVERSE SEXISM, EXHIBITIONISM
I'm running along a freeway, pacing a cheetah. But the kittens can't keep up...
From Baffin Bay to suburbia, dragons are everywhere... if you look with a dragon's eye...
Every year, as Americans get fatter, the fashion gets thinner (and I look more normal)...
A pod of whales in the sky and a circle of children dressed like seed-pods both beg me to interpret them...
I'm jogging in Yosemite. A man tells me I'm possessed. There IS something in my shoe...
The goddess of the Cult of Clutter catches a little thief, and tastes her to see if she’s worthy...
A baseball star breaks her leg (with a little help from the other team). It delays her career but but speeds her marriage. Did she NEED a....break?
I'm in medieval England on a mission from God, but I meet a Priestess on a mission from...well, we argue.
Time-travel the Navaho way! But our bread-pipe gets hijacked, so we call the Bird. Who shows up, all right...
CAUTION: NON-STANDARD SAVIOR, EVIL DREAM PUNS
I grew extra penises which bud off me like fruit. So I fry them up like sausages, and...
CAUTION: GENITALIA FOR LUNCH
I’m a brown sparrow scratching in the dirt, looking for bugs. Focused, tireless, I hunt and peck...
"I am a man upon the land; I am a Selkie in the sea..." Silky or selkie means a were-seal...
I must rescue Ann Soforth from righteous rapists, then Paul McCartney from a musical curse...
CAUTION: ABUSED CHILD, JOYCEAN LANGUAGE
When your brain-cops are edgy, you're getting warm!
Three dream-reactions to a (real) psychic experiment that went badly awry...
How did my bondage dream turn into a slot-machine jackpot? And what kind of change is pouring out?...
CAUTION: (CON)SENSUAL BONDAGE
My shortcut in a marathon bogs down in a maze full of psychoanalysts! So I climb the walls and...
I dream a Chinese fable: how the poet Li Po was abucted by the gods, till they face heavenly justice...
CAUTION: ABDUCTION, DRUNKS, EVIL PUN
Half asleep, I scrawl a nightmare of trying to rescue gasping boyfish, but my dreamwriting goes wrong too...
My mom hires a therapist who really goes for my throat! Why is she so desperate to make me lose my...
CAUTION: OVER-THE-TOP CONFRONTATION
The image got lost, but the words survived, so here's the poetic saga of an ant that left th' farm...
Our cowboy posse tracks a fugitive to a strange amethyst mine, where we're offered peculiar jobs...
I'm a mouse with a protest banner saying "FREEDOM!", having a slight argument with a cat...
Through wild jungles and over the Mattress Mountains, I lead a giant purple newt to love...
Like a lot of playful beasts, I like a friendly nip in the evening...
After seeing an Einstein biography I find myself in the bathrooms of Thought-Experiment High, and...
CAUTION: DARK SIDE OF AN ICON
I go lucid and drive my bed to the Nevada desert where I see my next million years. And so far, it’s been true...
My uncle mocks the racehorse he rides! Smears lipstick on this stallion, calls him a wimp... Why?
At the time I didn't even notice the pun...
Book pages, Tarot's four Page cards, being paged, and a girl named Page, add up to warn me I'm not being honest with myself or my friends...
I hang my artshow, but cut my palm. So I dream of a palm tree whose only problem is the road it's by...
My sister and her friend the snake-woman tell me the facts of life: the golden hooks, the piglets...
CAUTION: UNRELIABLE GYNECOLOGY
I'm peeking at Pike's Peak with Gregory Peck, as we seek my dream-journals in the Hawaiian jungles...
CAUTION: STUPID PSYCHIC PUNS
I dreamed I had to go through the Animal Orgy to get to the City of the Shining Spirits on the horizon...
CAUTION: STRANGE SEX
I'm an abused girl turning tricks to survive. But this is San Francisco: I join a prostitutes' co-op, and meet...
CAUTION: PROSTITUTES WITH SELF-RESPECT, OH NO!
I'm a robot in high school. I have my first dream, but I'm deaf to its message cuz it's not spectacular...
A Japanese high school athlete has no friends, till she starts meeting animal spirits on her long solo runs...
I'm a Japanese pearldiver; our family's cast away on a coral islet. One day, lonely, scared, I cast away fear...
Howe's sewing-machine design didn't work until, one night, warriors stuck him in a soup-pot, jabbing him with needle-sharp spears...
CAUTION: OUCH!
My sisters play with dice. Miriel can influence them telekinetically, but she can't hold them: too young to have thumbs!
I'm going mad! I'm an insomniac trapped in a flat full of snoring writers and reporters...
A dead fern in my backyard starts sending me messages in some strange language...
My family moves into a damp basement. My dad just sneers at the leaks. "I'll show you REAL leaking..."
A street poet preaches a gospel of smallness, until he pokes at capitalism in a slightly too personal way...
I'm in a department store trying on clothes when I notice there's a large zucchini growing from my crotch...
CAUTION: SQUASHY PENIS, ICKY RECIPE
Through twin gates of dream -- Dream-castles on the sea, lovely and lame -- A surfer of the San Andreas Fault
I'm Sybil Sue, a hard-boiled shapeshifting shamus, on the track of the most wanted bankrobbers in LA: the Bad Girls...
CAUTION: IN BETWEEN GUNSHOTS, THE BAD GIRLS SWEAR
Solve a hieroglyphic riddle and you can fly, shapeshift, work magic! But someone doesn't want me solving that riddle...
Having (or living with) a sharp mind is like living with a unicorn. That horn can kill or heal...
I live in a beehive. We must mate with dogs. I'm assigned a bitch. But I'm allergic to gods! Oops, I mean...
CAUTION: SEXUAL THEME, DOGGESS WORSHIP
Golfing in the basement! But the ball lands in another world, where the water hazards are hazards...
My foot is a torso and my toes sprout conflicting personalities...
CAUTION: STUPID CARTOON NUDITY
They call it the information highway because we're all supposed to march in formation...
Why's Mexico City built where it is? And why is corn called "ears"? It turns out these questions are linked...
I finally find a way to safely indulge in heavy petting (as well as puns) with the cat...
My mind and my soul both apply for a job in Stanford Cathedral. Their rivalry grows to a shamanic duel...
Since when is a dream of a disastrous camping trip a medical diagnosis? It depends on your pun-tolerance...
Ever since I was battered I feel like a virgin again: longing, but wary--scared where sex may lead...
CAUTION: CARTOON NUDITY, SEXUAL THEMES
I didn't even think of "windbag" since it didn't talk a bit. That bag was all action--full of flying magic...